Self esteem occurs in three different levels because it’s a concept that develops gradually. The basic degrees of self esteem are considered as:

  • Having a high self esteem means feeling confidently capable in life, a feel of worth or a feel of being the right person in everything.
  • Having a low self esteem means a person is not up to the standards of everyday living otherwise the person feels he/she is the wrong one.
  • Having a mild self esteem means the person is in two states. A state crowded with confusing and conflicting decisions. The person feels capable and ineffective, appropriate and inappropriate and this is shown through actions like lateness and rashness at times. This amounts to insecurity.

However, the more flexible a person is, the better he/she can resist everything that would otherwise make them fall into a low esteem desperation. Truth is you are the worthy human being without those things. In case, you are suffering from low self esteem, then here are some things that you may do in order to overcome this.

Stop Comparing to Other People: And it is unfortunate however many people start comparing themselves to people while they are young. The parents, and other loved ones, can tell them they are not very good as somebody else and they must strive to be like them in the effort to get it to improve in talent or behavior. Problem with this is that there can always be the people who are much better than you in some task, have an access to more sources, and are in the better job position. By comparing yourself to people is the self defeating & unnecessary act. You need to appreciate your strengths & good qualities.

Remember Your Achievement: One more method you may raise your self esteem is remember when you have achieved the goal and had some other successes in your life. Very often we reflect on times while we failed & we start to think we may do nothing right. Truth is you have had as many successes in the life as you had the failures. Take out one piece of paper & start writing them down & read them when you start to feel very bad about yourself this is great self esteem building.

Associate with the Positive People: The negative people are the people who just see what is actually wrong with the whole world. Self Esteem will save us all!



There are three main stimuli to self esteem:

  1. i.        Reflected appraisal– This refers to messages received from those who assess you. For example, people tend to be unable to believe in themselves with low self esteem once those who are close to them do not acknowledge them.
  2. ii.        Social comparison – is the individuals’ evaluation done by comparison of one’s own capability, characteristics and achievements to others. If a person is surrounded by superior people perceived to be more talented, they tend to lose their esteem and the ‘versa’ is true with low self esteem.
  3. iii.        Self-worth contingencies – This is how self esteem is influenced and this is through what is professed to be of utmost importance to us. For example, one person’s self esteem is raised in academics hence gaining a lot of friends.

They are likely to abuse themselves, as well as might stay in the physically and emotionally abusive relationships. Low self esteem can actually affect every aspect of lives our relationships, income, and health. I have also seen firsthand how the low self esteem will lead to debit, under earning, obesity and anorexia, as well as anti-social behavior. Our self esteem evolves and develops throughout lives when we build the image of ourselves through experiences with various people as well as activities. Experiences during childhood play large role in shaping of the basic self esteem“.

Lots of times, in case, we are suffering from the low self-esteem in the childhood, then this might plague us in our adolescence & adulthood. In case, we are suffering from the negative thoughts regarding ourselves we will attract the negative situations, and when provided many options, we might just see the negative solution, as it matches the comfort level. Plenty of our time is actually spent dealing with self absorbed negative thoughts, which we can’t be of service to people. That motivated me, as I am the spiritual person and can help others. For past decade I have studied methods to improve my own self esteem as well as are keenly aware how self esteem issues may impact lives of family and friends. And this led in improving my diet as well as dressing better that in turn lead to productivity & satisfaction in work life that lead to income & opportunities. Think about your personality and find one thing that is admirable. Are you kind, compassionate, creative or tenacious? Focus on one aspect of the personality & watch what actually happens.


Low self esteem should be avoided at any cost. It leads to one underestimating themselves and hinders them from trying different things. As a way to improve your self esteem, it is good to commend yourself everyday in everything you do. This should be accompanied by listing some events that made you smile before retiring to bed. Another way is to stop underestimating your capabilities, your look or your background. Instead of spending time thinking of such things that will never change, it is better to look at the positive things in your life. Increasing self esteem also requires you not to listen to others discouraging words. You should always take such comments lightly and live like at peace.

Here are some tips, which have actually helped me out.

1. Find out something you like of yourself. Let us say you hate your own body not a great place for self esteem. Find one very important thing that you may truly say that you like about your body. And for me, I have learned to like my wrists- and they are thin & delicate. Eventually, I started to feel more and more self esteem of the appreciation for other area of my body & I value my good health.

2. Look at what is going well and what you are doing right. And nothing is ever black & white. Fine, let us say you have got no job, home, friends, and poor health, & no income or money. You are helping planet by release of the carbon dioxides that feeds plants. Even though you get fired from the job, look what self esteem you do well when you were employed & focus on that. In case, you have the job, which you hate, then at least you are working, and going through fourth divorce, you are keen to get involved with other human being. Look what you are learning and when you are feeling bad about yourself, then write the list of accomplishments. List mus include everything that you have done & ways that you have helped others. The items on list do not have to be big. Maybe you got the newspaper to disabled neighbor, did not scream at husband while you wanted to, self esteem got lots of filing done in work, and helped your son to pick out the shirt…write this down. Whenever the list is complete, then you have to read it to the trusted friend.



The psychological health of a person starts with the essential core of the person accepting themselves, being loved and respected by others. Self esteem will help the person face life with more confidence and optimism making them achieve their goals in life. Self esteem allows people to be more ambitious in respect to emotional, creative and spiritual experiences hence widening the capacity of being happy.

Self esteem convinces people that they deserve to be happy. It increases the capacity of an individual in treating others with respect and goodwill hence favoring good interpersonal relationships.

At the work place, self esteem allows creativity and creates conditions good enough for teaching and learning. Seeing the list of accomplishments will help us to appreciate ourselves. Remember some days it is fine just to suck air. In case, you are fighting the tough emotional battle, then staying alive & sucking air is the huge accomplishment.

Find somebody to help and someway to be of the service. Current neurological research indicates when you give to somebody else, the chemical in brain named dopamine changes. With Self Esteem your brain cannot tell in case, you are giving and receiving, however you feel better. So, find easy ways to help people. Write & post the helpful ezine article, give somebody the flower, baby sit friend’s child, go on talk to shut in, walk your dogs for humane society in area, and volunteer for one day community project. While I was suffering from the mild depression and low self esteem, I found strength getting out of the bed as I was taking care of the stray cat. When I had the bad day, then I held on this fact it stray cat was better, as I was alive & helping it.

Do something that you love to do. People who are suffering from the low self esteem often punish themselves. The inner voice might say, “I cannot go to beach I need to get more and more work done.” Ignore voice & go do something that you actually love. In case, doing something that you love causes the backfire of some negative thoughts, and do something that you love for the short time. Maybe you can spend fifteen minutes reading the art magazine, working on the jigsaw puzzle and working on the garden. Definitely you have the bills to pay, family requirements to tend to & there is work that has to be done. However, you are just spending 15minutes away from the responsibilities.