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SELF ESTEEM ENHANCES QUALITY OF LIFE

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A healthy self esteem means that you have joy in you, you are able to handle any situation confidently and in a polite manner as you are able to make prominent decisions on your own, you feel loved, cared for, appreciated and accepted by others. Also you learn to appreciate your work and the other workers. By doing so you will have created good relationships with other members in the society that will lead to a good and happy life. By you feeling valued you will have the opportunity to make positive changes in the community since you have that potential. So when you have a positive self esteem you are likely to improve your life quality.

The self esteem is choice that we make and choice many times in a day. You might say, however I am very shy, or I am not very pretty, or I cannot think very fast, or no one thinks I may do that. But, by making the comments, you have actually made your choice & you have selected low self esteem. It bears repeating, choice is yours and you may select the high self esteem, and you may select low self esteem. Still, you are same person doesn’t matter which selection you make, it doesn’t change. But, your selection of self esteem makes the huge difference. It actually means everything to future. In case, you select high self esteem, then you may have everything that your heart desires. In case, you select low self esteem, then you get nothing.

So, why not select high self esteem? It is actually the no brainer, isn’t this? I want you perform the small exercise. In case, , all life, you have selected low self esteem, for only one moment just look back like you had selected high self esteem. And we have heard never-ending talk on Self-Esteem & generally we have agreed that it is very important. Thus, how come it is the epidemic of the low Self Esteem infecting society, especially our youth today?

SELF ESTEEM AND SELFLESSNESS

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Being selfless makes one have high self esteem. The ability to give out, being humble, concerned and sharing with others will always lead you to a good position in the society. Selflessness makes one attain a good personal stand and negates one from being mean to others. With a selfless heart, you attain good relationships and interaction with others; hence you exchange happy ideas and this leads to a joyful life that is a quality of high self esteem. Though this is a very good practice, it is very rarely practiced by people and religions. Being selfless calls for self sacrifice that is hard for many to practice, but if applied, it makes one gain love and appreciation for others.

Best example of negative impacts of people’s low self esteem is when the parent with the low self-esteem actually behaves in the non loving way towards their kids who in turn can grow up with the low self esteem & do same to people. Each word you say to others, each gesture & action is been influenced by the self-esteem. In case, you have the low self -esteem that you can normally have the negative effect on people. Level of the self esteem is obviously not only the personal matter. Compare in the mind country where all political leaders have the high self esteem with the country where all leaders have the low self-esteem. In case, I lived in country with the low self esteem politicians I will demonstrate to send them all on the self esteem course!

The self esteem has the larger impact other people’s lives than the skills in physics, mathematics, history, music, and any other school subject. Still self-esteem isn’t officially taught in the schools. While I was the child, we had textbook named “I’m good enough”. As adult I will guess that the book was been supposed to teach us the self esteem, however all students (that includes me) hated these classes as they were very boring.

 

SELF ESTEEM AND RELATIONSHIPS

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Happiness and good relationships are vital aspects in life. You can’t be assured of any happiness in you if you don’t relate well with other people as we often need their support in everything we do. As we all know, no man is an island and we need other people to survive. When you value yourself and those around you, this translates to high self esteem and encourages those you relate with to feel good about themselves as well. Having good relationships with your friends and family is vital and this can be through communication, doing things together, encouraging one another and looking out for each other.

With all the negative outcomes in the lives, they are ones, which have to raise the self esteem most. Unluckily, they are not motivated for seeking the self esteem coach, read the self esteem books and attend the self-esteem courses. Not till things get actually bad they can begin to look for some help. Instead waiting till things get totally worse, it is good to begin to look for different methods to raise the self-esteem instantly. Even though you think your self esteem is about average it is good to improve it rather than waiting for this to sink lower. The self esteem is relationship you have to yourself, sense of the personal worth. The self esteem may thus appear like the private issue. With the low self esteem the lives are been affected negatively in different directions. Less friends, short lasting as well as less satisfying relationships, depression, worse physical health, anxiety, stress and so on.

But, self esteem affects not just your life, but also it affects lives of everybody around you. Level of the self esteem affects how you actually treat others who you interact with and avoid interaction with. Also, you probably have been victim of somebody with the low self esteem yourself. Perhaps the colleague who try to impose their way on others, teacher who do their best to make life miserable, and maybe the grumpy neighbor.

 

POINTS TO REFLECT ON TO MAINTAIN HIGH SELF ESTEEM

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Some points should always be reflected on to maintain high self esteem. These include thinking positively in every situation. Negative thoughts should always be interrupted with positive ones. Having a smile on your face is another point to note as a smile attracts others to you and there you can exchange ideas. Facing ones fears as well as forgetting the failures will always lead you to high self esteem. Keeping out the worry of what other people think of you is another point to be reflected on; this gives you the chance to think of the future and your success. Commending yourself in every little thing you do keeps you on the go as well as maintains your high self esteem. Being nice to others and avoiding undermining them, helps you maintain a high self esteem.

When your requirement for the self esteem is been fulfilled then you are free continuing your journey for self actualisation.

Books: There are many books that will help you increase self esteem. Read the self esteem and self help book (like Self-Esteem Toolbox) and just pick the book, which makes you feel very good about yourself. Book does not necessarily need to be about topic self-esteem to raise the self-esteem. Select books, which are positive & inspiring.

Home study Plan: In order, to benefit from guidance of the expert and you have comfortability & freedom to work on the self esteem where and when you want, you may select the self esteem home study plan. Check for instance Self Esteem Toolkit Series (3 versions: basic, “for the busy people” & deluxe).

Courses: In case, you wish to raise the self esteem with the expert guidance & together with people, then take the self esteem course is one great option. By raising self-esteem is fun & you may build a lot of new friendships. Check if there are courses going in the local area and take the distance course.

 

PEER PRESSURE AND ITS EFFECTS ON SELF ESTEEM

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Not all our friends are good, some of them are likely to mislead us when we follow what they are doing or what they are advising us on thus they may ruin our life. So it’s upon you to analyze the kind of friends you have. When you have a healthy self esteem it means that you are able to make decisions on your own. As such, try and pick friends based on their positive attributes. Your friends may have suggestions on what you should do but you as an individual need to make the final decision. Peer pressure can either drive one to low self esteem or high self esteem. Seek to have people who build you as opposed to those who may take pleasure in putting you down or always saying something negative.

In case, you are suffering from the low self confidence (and are told you do), and treat people with the low confidence (and think you do), then read on. Also, there are some self esteem myths, which will block the progress while trying to lift the self esteem. The low self worth is scientifically studied & actual findings of the research helped inform facts you can come over here.  Mark Tyrrell, the co-author of Self Confidence Trainer, has completed the UK tours in 2002, 2003 & 2005 teaching many health experts the facts about the self esteem as well as how you may treat your low self esteem in patients.

He has co-authored the book on the self worth for the Axis Publishing named Giant Within – Maximise Self Worth. Like you may imagine, Mark has done lots of research for seminar on ‘How to Lift Your Low Self Esteem’. He also has listed his most important ‘Tips’ here. By stopping the people being bullies just by trying to lift the self esteem might be like trying in getting the obese person to lose little weight by th1e way of feeding more cake.

 

LEVELS OF SELF ESTEEM

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Self esteem occurs in three different levels because it’s a concept that develops gradually. The basic degrees of self esteem are considered as:

  • Having a high self esteem means feeling confidently capable in life, a feel of worth or a feel of being the right person in everything.
  • Having a low self esteem means a person is not up to the standards of everyday living otherwise the person feels he/she is the wrong one.
  • Having a mild self esteem means the person is in two states. A state crowded with confusing and conflicting decisions. The person feels capable and ineffective, appropriate and inappropriate and this is shown through actions like lateness and rashness at times. This amounts to insecurity.

However, the more flexible a person is, the better he/she can resist everything that would otherwise make them fall into a low esteem desperation. Truth is you are the worthy human being without those things. In case, you are suffering from low self esteem, then here are some things that you may do in order to overcome this.

Stop Comparing to Other People: And it is unfortunate however many people start comparing themselves to people while they are young. The parents, and other loved ones, can tell them they are not very good as somebody else and they must strive to be like them in the effort to get it to improve in talent or behavior. Problem with this is that there can always be the people who are much better than you in some task, have an access to more sources, and are in the better job position. By comparing yourself to people is the self defeating & unnecessary act. You need to appreciate your strengths & good qualities.

Remember Your Achievement: One more method you may raise your self esteem is remember when you have achieved the goal and had some other successes in your life. Very often we reflect on times while we failed & we start to think we may do nothing right. Truth is you have had as many successes in the life as you had the failures. Take out one piece of paper & start writing them down & read them when you start to feel very bad about yourself this is great self esteem building.

Associate with the Positive People: The negative people are the people who just see what is actually wrong with the whole world. Self Esteem will save us all!

 

IMPROVING ONE’S SELF ESTEEM

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Low self esteem should be avoided at any cost. It leads to one underestimating themselves and hinders them from trying different things. As a way to improve your self esteem, it is good to commend yourself everyday in everything you do. This should be accompanied by listing some events that made you smile before retiring to bed. Another way is to stop underestimating your capabilities, your look or your background. Instead of spending time thinking of such things that will never change, it is better to look at the positive things in your life. Increasing self esteem also requires you not to listen to others discouraging words. You should always take such comments lightly and live like at peace.

Here are some tips, which have actually helped me out.

1. Find out something you like of yourself. Let us say you hate your own body not a great place for self esteem. Find one very important thing that you may truly say that you like about your body. And for me, I have learned to like my wrists- and they are thin & delicate. Eventually, I started to feel more and more self esteem of the appreciation for other area of my body & I value my good health.

2. Look at what is going well and what you are doing right. And nothing is ever black & white. Fine, let us say you have got no job, home, friends, and poor health, & no income or money. You are helping planet by release of the carbon dioxides that feeds plants. Even though you get fired from the job, look what self esteem you do well when you were employed & focus on that. In case, you have the job, which you hate, then at least you are working, and going through fourth divorce, you are keen to get involved with other human being. Look what you are learning and when you are feeling bad about yourself, then write the list of accomplishments. List mus include everything that you have done & ways that you have helped others. The items on list do not have to be big. Maybe you got the newspaper to disabled neighbor, did not scream at husband while you wanted to, self esteem got lots of filing done in work, and helped your son to pick out the shirt…write this down. Whenever the list is complete, then you have to read it to the trusted friend.

 

IMPORTANCE OF SELF ESTEEM

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The psychological health of a person starts with the essential core of the person accepting themselves, being loved and respected by others. Self esteem will help the person face life with more confidence and optimism making them achieve their goals in life. Self esteem allows people to be more ambitious in respect to emotional, creative and spiritual experiences hence widening the capacity of being happy.

Self esteem convinces people that they deserve to be happy. It increases the capacity of an individual in treating others with respect and goodwill hence favoring good interpersonal relationships.

At the work place, self esteem allows creativity and creates conditions good enough for teaching and learning. Seeing the list of accomplishments will help us to appreciate ourselves. Remember some days it is fine just to suck air. In case, you are fighting the tough emotional battle, then staying alive & sucking air is the huge accomplishment.

Find somebody to help and someway to be of the service. Current neurological research indicates when you give to somebody else, the chemical in brain named dopamine changes. With Self Esteem your brain cannot tell in case, you are giving and receiving, however you feel better. So, find easy ways to help people. Write & post the helpful ezine article, give somebody the flower, baby sit friend’s child, go on talk to shut in, walk your dogs for humane society in area, and volunteer for one day community project. While I was suffering from the mild depression and low self esteem, I found strength getting out of the bed as I was taking care of the stray cat. When I had the bad day, then I held on this fact it stray cat was better, as I was alive & helping it.

Do something that you love to do. People who are suffering from the low self esteem often punish themselves. The inner voice might say, “I cannot go to beach I need to get more and more work done.” Ignore voice & go do something that you actually love. In case, doing something that you love causes the backfire of some negative thoughts, and do something that you love for the short time. Maybe you can spend fifteen minutes reading the art magazine, working on the jigsaw puzzle and working on the garden. Definitely you have the bills to pay, family requirements to tend to & there is work that has to be done. However, you are just spending 15minutes away from the responsibilities.

DEFINING SELF ESTEEM

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In psychology, self esteem reflects on a person’s overall view and evaluation of his/her own worth. Self esteem comprises beliefs and emotional actions like desperation, pride and shame. It could also be distinguished by the concept of how an individual thinks about themselves. However, this can be in a positive or negative aspect.

Self-esteem can be applicable to particular individuals or it can be of a global scope and extent. Usually it is regarded as an endurance of personal characteristics and it’s normal with short-lived variations.
Other names used to define self esteem include: self-regard, self-worth, self-respect or self-integrity. According to some scientific researches definition, self esteem is the desire or instinct of promoting one’s own being.

And it put things in the perspective & helped me be present & available throughout rest of my day. Recovering from the low self-esteem is achievable. According to the science we shed & recreate cells of body. Each 7 years, on the cellular level we are the new person! In case, you have the low self esteem, then you might have depression. Speaking with the therapist will as well help. Lots of other actions are also helpful like spending time outdoors, exercise, changing diet being organic & whole foods based. Recovery procedure will feel like “2 step”-2 steps forward, and 1 step back.

There are days when you might feel as if you have made not any progress. Be very gentle with yourself and it takes little time to retrain thought & behavior pattern, however I am living proof it is likely & worth an effort. Some techniques of raising self esteem are simple and some are very hard. Some are fun and some boring. Why not to select the simple and fun methods of raising the self esteem? In case, you would like to have the high self-esteem, then try to have a smile on your face every time. Smiles are magical and think about it, some things are contagious as the smile. Smile is as well best universally understood symbol of happiness and good feeling generally. So, what is the low self esteem anyway? That doesn’t explain person who is very good in everything however is not happy with the appearance. Is it lack of the social interaction skills, as there are a few people that are life of party however cannot get up & speak in front of the crowd.

CAUSES OF LOW SELF ESTEEM IN KIDS

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Kids with low self esteem usually disparage themselves as they don’t even see themselves achieving anything in life. This is usually brought by parents, who are the key factor to motivating their young ones, whereby they don’t encourage kids in whatever they do. Low self esteem in kids is also caused by squabbling of parents, who have their differences, ending up in yells and fights at times. This will always lower your kid’s self esteem as they have no one to term as their role models. Teachers are also a great course of low self esteem in kids especially if they don’t ever appreciate how kids perform and guide them to improving their performance in class. At times kids may not perform to their expected levels in some subjects, and if not motivated by teachers, they end up hating the subject and thus gain low self esteem.

There many methods where you may use smiles for raising self-esteem. Here are a few suggestions:
Smile at yourself. While you do this then “happiness hormones” are been released in brain. While your eyes see image of you at a same time since these hormones are swirling over you, and your brain can begin to associate image of you with the pleasant feeling. You may program the brain to think You = Good. Essence of the self esteem is knowledge you are good, thus this is one simple and powerful method to raise your self-esteem.

Smile at people! Lots of people unfortunately base the sense of how fine they are on and how others treat them. Though true self esteem generally comes from inside, you may still make use of others to help you to raise the self esteem. More that you smile to others, more others may smile on you.

Finally, try and simple smile. You do not actually need the mirror and other people’s presence for raising your self-esteem just by smiling. More you smile, better you get in feeling happy. Happiness isn’t something, which happens to lucky, it is the skill, which is trained. Practice feeling happy & you can automatically feel much happy about yourself. People are labeled as having the low self esteem that are shy and reserved. I do not think that you may say somebody has low self-esteem because they feel little inadequate in area of life.